'Agree With Everything - Deny Nothing - Embellish All

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Vexillatious Litigation

Readers with long memories will recall this summer's saga of the Cumbrian flag. It has been brought to our attention that someone has taken exception to our vexillographic blogging. This someone believes that the Cumbrian flag is his own intellectual property and has wheeled out the lawyers to park their tanks on the lawn. Not on our lawn, you understand, (above which the Cumbrian flag still flies proud and unvanquished), but that of the estimable Turtle & Pearce, flagmakers to the quality.
One really doesn't know what to make of this. I'm told that the only flag design you cannot legally copy is the Royal Standard (to which Mrs Battenburg is welcome). So far as we know there is no other flag, national, regional or county, over which an individual has a right of property. So someone asserts that the Cumbrian flag is his. But if it's the Cumbrian flag, surely it belongs to the county and citizens of Cumbria? If it belongs to a private individual, then it is not a Cumbrian flag. We confess to disappointment: we'd thought the Cumbrian flag genuinely archaic, an authentic expression of our fabulously tangled cultural heritage, but it seems that the owner dreamt it up himself some time last year. So in what sense is it Cumbrian? Better not ask the lawyers. But we're anxiously scanning the horizon for sight of their tanks, should they try to park them on our lawn too. As a precaution we've wrapped barbed wire round the flagpole, set up a gun emplacement, and spent the evening rehearsing a harmony version of 'Oh Say Can You See By The Dawn's Early Light?'
We'll keep you informed of developments.

6 Comments:

Blogger Piers said...

Shoot when you see the whites of their eyes (but if they are actually in a tank, for God's sake, scream like a banshee and run like the wind).

Really, how ridiculous.

17/11/05 8:56 pm  
Blogger Nick said...

Piers, I couldn't agree more, and only deference to the sensitivities of our flag suppliers, who are nice people, prevents me from publishing further in this post on the complete idiocy of the line being taken. Perhaps I'll feel provoked to do so in a day or two . . .

17/11/05 11:09 pm  
Blogger Lex said...

If you're going to sing "The Star-Spangled Banner" (for so it is called) well, best to hoist a few pints first. The melody is from an old drinking song called "To Anacreon in Heaven," and several professional singers I know maintain that the only way to cover adequately the song's nearly-2-octave range is to get drunk first.

I don't know why we didn't change the national anthem to "America the Beautiful" a long time ago.

18/11/05 6:09 pm  
Blogger Andy said...

Im a proud Cumbrian and reckon we should have our on flag, i have seen many of those stickers in the county (mostly in St Bees). if you need any help with the tanks let me know

14/3/06 9:16 pm  
Blogger Nick said...

Andy, that's a very kind offer. I've been spending rather a lot of time in St Bees myself recently, and can't say I'd noticed any bumper stickers. Hang on. That would be my car then wouldn't it . . . doh . . .

14/3/06 11:52 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've created my own Cumbrian Flag for taking to Cumbrian sporting events (primarily Carlisle United matches. It is simply the Cumbrian coat of arms in the centre (on white bar) with a blue bar horizontally above, and a green bar horizonatl below.

I've had a couple printed up, and they've made several appearances. Also got one in my car window.

Hail Cumbria!!

Posted by Kynson, the Cumbrian Separatist :-)

9/11/07 3:19 pm  

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