'Agree With Everything - Deny Nothing - Embellish All

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

You've Got Mail . . .

The Renaissance couple's garden gate is adorned by an American style post-box, an elaborate metal contraption with a perky little red rod that pops up to signal the arrival of news from the outside world . . . But sometimes we have trouble distinguishing the medium from the message. One recent morning we found within the box a brown paper bag, unaddressed, which contained: two long strips of velcro, a black suspender belt, and a sachet of laxative inscribed with what turned out to be the phone number of the West Lakes Renaissance Agency.
What did it mean? Perhaps the more sophisticated members of Cumbrian society were using it as a dead letter-box for bizarre love-calls? Perhaps it was all quite innocent? Suspicion fell upon the Wandering Minstrel, but he has departed to build a yurt (fn) in Lancaster, and have a prolonged jam session with his seven-piece all-girl bongo band.
We shall never know the truth.
FN: Yurt (noun), an eco-friendly portable construction used as a shelter or dwelling-place. Also, a sort of Geordie pleasure-boat.


Anonymous Davidson girl said...

There are several yurts near my home. I am astonished that you must define one.

Davidson girl

13/4/05 11:59 pm  
Blogger RenMan said...

Ok.. the truth is stranger than fact. Mary (leader of the Fairy Band) was leaving some stilt making materials for the minstrel(more later?). She also needed to leave him the tel. number of the West Lakes Renaissance (posible source of funds for Mass Yurt Production Ltd) and the only thing that she could find to write upon was the laxative sachet. (CSI Miami would never have worked that lot out. Since then the Patterdale princess has shredded the velcro and eaten the rubber bits from one of the suspenders
now Holmes .... 1 suspender - no rubber bits; 1 suspender intact; shredded velcro; a sachet of laxative with the telephone number of the WLR and a small evil black dog...... ummmm

15/4/05 9:31 am  
Blogger Nick said...

Geordie pleasure boats all over suburban Maryland? Shome mishtake here, shurely?

17/4/05 8:58 pm  
Blogger RenMan said...

In Maryland there are yurts, faeries, soft wet rain, bubbles buses.....

17/4/05 11:42 pm  

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